Mom

​Donna Jeanne Coffey Young passed away peacefully early on December 1st in Tucson, Arizona shortly after her three kids joined her for the nightly prayers she had taught them 50 years ago. 
 
Born in Cambridge, MA to Daniel J. and A. Stephanie Coffey, as the middle child of three, Donna liked to be in the middle of things. She would often start conversations in the middle of the story, loved to be in the middle of friends, the center of a party, in the midst of whatever was going on. Warm and loving, Donna created too many lifelong friendships to safely name in this obit (she would be upset if we left someone out, which we would inevitably do because we couldn’t keep up). She lived for her friends and family.
 
Donna was raised in Jamaica Plain and Arlington, and attended Matignon High School. Though she majored in Business Administration at Regis College, she was best known for her socializing and her faith. Early on, she forged a hotline to her Guardian Angel, and was on a first-name basis with many saints. Chances are, if you are reading this obit, you were in her prayers at some point, perhaps perpetually (ahem, often her kids: “I didn’t have grey hair before I was a mother”).
 
She paid for college by waitressing at the Farragut Inn for two years, where she again created lifelong friendships and took multitasking to a new level, a skill she used daily as a mom (Though when things got intensely busy, she was heard to say, “God only gave me two hands but three kids. Figure it out.”).  She excelled at whatever task she put her mind to: as executive assistant to the owner of Yewell Associates and of South Shore Mental Health, or teaching third grade, or at Talbots. 
 
Donna met the love of her life John Young at a bar called the 99. They married within five months of meeting, which set the gossip circuits aflame, but their daughter Pauline (Rush) arrived a solid 13 months after their wedding. Motherhood was Donna’s calling, and 18 months later, Stephanie (Rosen) joined the family, followed by John (Jake) three years later. (Her girls recall her saying, “A son is the anchor to a mother’s heart.” Her boy remembers her saying, “The world does not revolve around the S-O-N”.)
 
Donna considered her first foreign assignment to be Pampa, Texas. Determined to “bloom where you are planted”, her friendships blossomed. Upon moving to Hingham, MA, Donna and John acquired their dream home and lived out the maxim: “Your friends become family.” She amassed a very large family during her life. 
 
When John was transferred to Brazil for work, Donna was convinced she, John and all three children would be killed in an uprising, but she summoned her courage and moved anyway: “We’ve got to pull ourselves up by our bootstraps, Kids.”  (Although bootstraps had long since gone out of style, she got her point across.)
 
In Brazil, she lived with her usual gusto for life, and dove into the culture. Despite her incredible ear for music and many, many lessons in Portuguese, Donna was surprised to discover that languages did not come easily to her. (When meeting John’s boss for the first time, she greeted him in her best Portuguese by saying, “Welcome to our home Dr. Hilianaro. May I please have your pants?” Mercifully, John kept his job). Donna’s adventurous spirit inspired incredible travel across all of South America, and then Europe, when John was transferred to Paris, France. 
 
In Paris, upon encountering the horror that is called French grammar, Donna enlisted a beloved member of the WWII French Resistance for weekly assistance over a six year period. Donna quickly assimilated to Parisian life, thanks to her impeccable sense of style, elegance and grace. In Paris, she headed up the American Catholic Women’s Organization, took gourmet cooking lessons, and knew all the best places to dine and shop: in short, she thrived. When factoring in her close friendships from Paris, her Christmas card list could be said to rival that only of Santa Claus. She was a bright star to all who knew her; her joie de vivre warming up the rainy gloom and chill of Parisian winters for her family especially. (And when that didn’t work, it was: “Kids, I’m cold; put on a sweater.”)
 
Wherever Donna went, she thrived because she was so interested in the people around her. She was a volunteer reader on the radio for the blind for over 20 years. She took friendship to new heights through her cards, baking, calls, laughter, lunches, and walks. Her incredible empathy and warmth drew people to her, and her optimism, humor and love of music brought joy to those of us who had the honor to know her. When she did not agree with other’s choices (ahem, often her kids), she would say to herself, (rather audibly), “Just smile and wear beige.” 
 
Her 56-year marriage to John was the cornerstone of her life. She and John loved to entertain, no matter where they were, and their dinner parties and celebrations were legendary.
 
Her Catholic faith was the anchor of her life. She spent years as a lector and Eucharistic minister. She was especially devoted to Mary, “the Mother of us All”. She loved the rosary, wore a scapular, and often gave friends novena cards and Holy Water from shrines she had visited in Fatima and Lourdes.
 
She fought hard to remain upbeat through difficult times, reminding us, “This too shall pass”. A child of the Depression, one of her favorite childhood memories was her dad coming home safely after years away in Northern Africa and Italy during WWII. In her last decade, she suffered the loss of many close friends, and battled dementia, but intentionally increased her sense of humor.
 
“One day, you’ll thank me.” Now that the day has come to thank her one last time, we are crippled by grief. We cannot thank her enough. Nor can we bear the thought of never again receiving her upbeat cards, clippings, hugs and phone calls.
 
Donna is predeceased by two months by her beloved John, with whom she literally could not live without. She leaves behind her children, their spouses Joe Rush, Jory Rosen and Darragh Fitzsimons, eight grandchildren: Florie, Bryce, Kyle, Tripp, Lillie Grace, Ali, Weston & Tyler, siblings Stephanie Cooper Clark, and Daniel Coffey (Susan), numerous nieces, nephews, Godchildren, cousins, and of course, those incredible, phenomenal lifelong friends (you know who you are).