January Grace

Let's call January Lillie Grace month....the rest of us just showed up

 
​If you don’t become the ocean, you will get seasick every day. - Leonard Cohen
 
As the first month of 2024 comes to a close, I hope that we’re each finding our own ways to keep hope alive.  When I was younger, I used to make “resolutions” that lasted maybe until Valentine’s Day if I were lucky. Now, I carefully select a word that represents a concept I want to grow in, one that will hopefully enhance my life from this point on.
 
After much consideration, I chose “surrender”. Bono used it to title the autobiography of his fantastic life. Oprah swears by “surrender” as much as she does “intention” and “gratitude”. Contrary to pop culture, surrender is not a dirty word. It doesn’t mean giving up, or waving the white flag. It seems that successful people know the secret to surrender. They put forth 100% effort, until there remains nothing else to add, no one else to contact, no other angle to try, and then let go. It takes understanding that if it is meant to be, it will come back to you. If it does not come back, the Universe/God will give you something better. It’s a belief I’m willing to test.  
 
Because of course, the minute I chose this word, I knew I would be tested. Oh Lordy, yes. But tired of hanging on to things I want that never materialized, I was ready to surrender. 
 
So far, who knows? All I can see is what I've let go of. However, in believing something better will come, surrender takes away a lot of the suffering from what would otherwise continue to be an anguishing thorn in my side.
 
Oh, the examples? I was perfect for a remote job coaching college essays this summer. The person hiring agreed, and I was a finalist. Poof. Inexplicably went to someone else. (“Now you know how I feel,” my grumpy husband groused.) I asked for feedback, but all I got was, “we so enjoyed talking with you too.” So, I must be on to something better this summer…
 
And it won’t be going back to the summer camp at which I taught six classes a day last year. My students are always my North Star. Always. When my teen counselors had their lunch periods routinely taken away, were yelled at, and tasked with teaching classes (with no pay bump) after other teachers quit, I spoke up. My counselors asked me to. Result: mysteriously, not only was I not offered a position this summer, but most of my classes are not even offered. I applied anyway, but was told I was not needed. So, I must be on to something better this summer…
 
I’m throwing down the gauntlet: Does surrendering things you wanted open you up to better opportunities? Stay tuned as the experiment unfolds!
 
In the meantime, I continue to write this amazing book in the mornings and am a search consultant in the afternoons, filling three teaching positions for a phenomenal elementary school in LA. I love my days.
 
Finally in my “spare time”, I’ve been treading the bipolar path of having one family soaring to new heights, with the other in the depths of despair.
 
Jory started January as a finalist for three marketing jobs. Job #1 finally said he was overqualified. Job #2 (a company run by 5 women) eventually went to a woman. Job #3 at last enthused that he is their #1 contestant, and they’ve…decided not to fill the position at this time. Cut to: Jory in the ER with blood pressure at 220/110. His heartbeat often races. He’s on medication. Really, could he just get a friggin’ job? Some kind of break? It’s been 9 months…
 
Thankfully, Lillie Grace is living her best life. Today she is the lead prosecutor in the grade’s mock trial. She is proving that Billy the Kid deserved to die, despite the fact that both sides in the Lincoln County War were corrupt. This past weekend, she was an alto in the New Mexico State Choir. Kids from all over the state auditioned through their schools (over 100 kids auditioned at her school alone; 19 were selected). Man, did they sound phenomenal!!! To top it off, she is rocking some beautiful studs after she went to a tat parlor and got her ears pierced . In her spare time, she’s deciding between committing to francais or espagnole for the rest of her school career. Let’s just call January Lillie Grace's month.
 
Let's see who gets the February award...